A London store cleverly called Hoxton Street Monster Supplies aims to be a “purveyor of quality goods for monsters of every kind.” One of their new additions is called Salt Made From Tears.
Our seller of monster supplies explains that fresh human tears are “gently boiled, released into shallow crystallisation tanks, then harvested by hand and finally rinsed in brine.” The salts come in different varieties: Salt made from “tears of anger,” tears from chopping onions, sneezing, laughter, and sorrow.
I'll take the salt made from tears of unfathomable sadness...
Hoxton Street Monster Supplies also sells the following products:
- The Awfully Bad Guide to Monster Housekeeping
- Tin cans of “Escalating Panic,” “Mortal Terror,” “The Heebie-Jeebies,” and “A Vague Sense of Unease”
- Zombie Fresh Mints (hey, good idea!)
- A jar of Bah Humbugs!
What? No tin of Whip-Ass?
Hoxton Street Monster Supplies is located at 159 Hoxton Street, London. A certain percentage of sales goes towards the Ministry of Stories, a creative writing center for young people in east London.